As my sister Rachel prepares for her soon-to-come wedding, I found it important to give her (and all the other engaged ladies and gentlemen out there) some useful prep talk! We have all heard the never-ending list of myths about weddings from an engagement ring has to be worth twice his monthly salary to everything needs to be DIY and personalized (who has the time?!).
Well, I refuse to accept them, and I’m here to show you that you don’t have to either. Here are 6 of the most popular wedding myths that you DON’T need to follow:
1) The wedding has to be extremely expensive
No, no, and no. The wedding industry is massive and wants you to spend an unnerving amount of money, more than you & your partner make in a few moths of salary combined. You don’t need to go down this path. You can look for alternative options such as having a wedding in someone’s backyard (if it’s big enough), in a park (if it’s allowed) and so on. You should consistently be looking for better deals and offers, and negotiating down with relevant parties. We don’t all need an extremely glamorous and expensive wedding. These are your life savings you are about to spend on one party!
2) The engagement ring must be a diamond
Back at the beginning of the last century, the concept of a diamond engagement ring did not exist. You can thank the savvy marketing men of the 1950s (a la Mad Men) for creating an entire campaign based on the idea that you must propose with a diamond ring, one which must also cost
two salaries worth. This is ludicrous. You do not need to spend so much on an engagement ring. There are better alternatives, like those featured in this great article, which also points out why there is no need to spend so much on a diamond ring.
3) You must have a wedding rehearsal
Those of us living outside the US, have barely even heard of a wedding rehearsal. It sounds like you’re being conned into having two parties at double the cost. What is the point of rehearsing? The rest of us worldwide don’t do it, and we seem to be in a good situation during the wedding day. If you want your family to become better acquainted, have dinner somewhere. Why are you renting the hall and having the same wedding guests join you twice? This baffles me!
4) Life is perfect after the wedding
Nope, sorry. The opposite occurs. You will be exhausted, financially drained and realize that being married doesn’t feel very different from how you felt when you were dating or engaged. There’s this myth that once you have your wedding, your life drastically changes from day to night. It will once you have children, that’s when you truly begin to feel like a family, but not right after the wedding day. Everything will feel eerily similar to the week and months before, minus the stress of organizing the party. Now come other types of stress: moving, planning, budgeting, etc.
5) You’ll never look more beautiful than on your wedding day
Sure, you’re getting your hair and makeup done, and you’re wearing a beautiful dress. You will feel beautiful. But is that necessarily the most beautiful you will ever be or feel? Is it all downhill from there?? No! I know plenty of people who look a lot better now than they did when they got married. I know others who are embarrassed by their shoulder pad wedding dress that was so “in” in the 1980s when they got married and looks a bit ridiculous today. Did they feel stunning back then? Heck yes. Have they not been stunning since then? They have, plenty.
6) The whole wedding has to be a moment of perfection
Any event planner can tell you: there is no such thing as an event that goes through flawlessly. There will always be issues popping up, microphones not working, people not to be found and so on. It’s normal. You can’t go into your wedding planning expecting to create this amazing, perfect wedding because it just won’t happen, and that’s okay. Roll with the punches, handle things as they come or let your family and friends handle them. Over-stressing is unnecessary. Try to be realistic – take on only what you can handle.
Do you have any more myths to share? Do you agree or disagree with me? Share your thoughts below!